Saturday, 19 October 2013

Anxiety Overload!

I was so cross, well in fact I'm still cross, at the beginning of the week!  The idiot that broke into one of the cars on Monday night does not realise the anguish and anxiety overload we are experiencing right now, and for what... £3!

Our 'Bob' along with so many others with autism suffers badly from extreme security anxiety.  This usually manifests it's self in THE most extreme response.  Within seconds of him hearing about the break-in I had to listen to the chunnering, I had to give a detailed report of the crime scene and had to put up with "I told you so" and "You should have followed my car parking plan for the drive, Mum!"  Yes, 'Bob' did produce a car park plan for our drive.  It makes it sound like we have an ENOURMOUS drive, we don't it's just a good shape for packing in the cars.  Of course 'Bob' then spent the next hour setting about completing a security plan, and reminders for the family which he promptly put up on the wall by the front door.  If nothing else 'Bob's thorough.  It's not just that though, it's the mental impact this has on him.  I thought we had dealt with checking doors all the time and the perimeter of the building before bedtime.  This episode has reared its ugly head again this week.  I have been reassuring him all week and it's completely exhausting.  The slightest thing can set him off and I have to pick up the pieces!

We already struggle getting 'Bob' out of the house and the uncertainty that comes with other peoples actions will push him back there.  I try and explain it to people but it is an emotion that is incredible difficult to describe from an autistic child’s perspective.  'Bob' can't break it down for someone to understand and I can only surmise.  I have to go on his actions and listen to what and how he is saying things.  You can tell he battles internally with the core sense of insecurity and trying to deal with it himself creates chronic anxiety too! No win situation whichever way we look at it!

All we can do is breakdown the information that is causing the grief and strip it back to its bare bones so to speak.  I try and do this in a calm environment usually surrounded by his precious things in hope the familiarity will give some comfort.  When 'Bob' goes to the extreme I have to remind him of the reality of life.  For instance with the car, it was parked on the opposite side of the street, close to a hedge, no street lighting and was quite close to the path.  It was an opportunist, so likely to be some oik roaming the streets just looking for mischief, the fact that the car was still there and the contents of the car placed on the front seat would suggest this too.  It is key breaking down the information in digestible pieces.  It will be a number of weeks before we can stop revisiting this.  Let’s hope we don't come across something else that takes up the anxiety mantel, and I have to start all over again!


  1. Would you believe that! It's what happened to us....poor Robert I can only imagine what he's going through! These 'people' have absolutely no idea what pain and upset they bring to others. The only thing thing that helped David was the visits by the police!

  2. I know Julia, shocking! He keeps tapping on the posters when we walk out the door just to make sure I read it. x