How far would you go to step into your child's world? Well, since the disappearance of Flight MH 370 I have been doing just that. I've jumped in and now I'm up to my shoulders in it! I have always found that I have been the parent on the periphery, I don't really bring much to the table. I mean I'm not really into science and engineering, and I've never had a penchant for trains, planes and automobiles!
As soon as 'Bob's radar hearing heard the words plane and crash resonating from the television, the whole house has been on news watch! Mr Autynary didn't need much encouragement either. It starts with a full run down of the overnight news from the moment we get up. Flicking between the BBC and Sky news channels, looking for vital clues and even the cross reference of data has managed to sneak into the morning routine without much interference. Strange that, when the change is desired it manages to pass quality control reasonably well.
I am given strict instructions to hold a watch on the latest updates, and if something genuinely important is reported to make sure Mr A gets an email. My own 'Breaking News' update is called for from the moment 'Bob' gets in the car after school, and we have to digest and evaluate any data change. 'Bob' is really eager to get home straight away, so unless I want a hoo-ha about stopping off for vital supplies, it's straight home we go.
You're probably thinking, Why? Stop! Or you're thinking I've gone completely barmy! I've missed The Voice, poor Phil and Holly haven't seen the light of day this week in Autynary Towers, and I didn't even get to see The Boys from Saturday Night Takeaway on a plus one.
I've found myself debating theories, and analysing speculation with Mr A and 'Bob' and have spent hours searching on the internet, like so many others, for a miracle landing on some uninhabited island. For Mr A and 'Bob' it's all about the technical and for me it's about the human aspect. The human aspect requires an understanding of emotion, empathic attitude, and psychological observations, all of which Mr A and 'Bob' do not find easy if at all! The importance of logic and mechanical failure is a preferred explanation for my boys, and the digestion of disparaging information about the crew intriguing. I need them and they need me to make sense of it all.
I know I've been swept away with this obsessive approach, and it won't be the last time either I'm sure. The principals are the same, though, working together to make sense of the world! I'm encouraged that this method will open up a window of understanding. I know emotions don't come with a formula that can be easily applied, but this is a good visual living experience which will become a memory.
Our 'Bob's last SLT review recently recognised he was still having difficulty seeing things from another persons point of view, and the differences they bring. Which, as any Auty parent will know, that is one hell of a difficulty in this world. When you put this in context with all those other difficulties you can see how even the smallest of positive influences can make a difference; he's still struggling adapting to change, difficulty in asking for help and other social interaction complexities!
I don't set out a plan to learn from every experience in our life, far from it. I'm not that organised to be honest! It's usually writing this blog, I find by epiphany! I just try to bring all of my neurotypical traits to the table in hope that we can find a balance that works for us as a family. I smile, 2 against 1, I have to go armed with something!